It has been very stressful around here. I must have made it clear. I am constantly worried about Vincent. Sometimes we feel he is alright, sometimes we get no indication. He had a re-examination yesterday and the vet said his progress was ‘good‘, not ‘great‘. That lady vet is a little curt and lacks the ‘right‘ tone when talking to the family. That’s why I sent John this time.

We reverted back to litter litter and he has been pooping and peeing, just not peeing nearly enough or to our satisfaction. I don’t know if I ever noticed now how often he used to pee before all this started. I am just hanging on to the deepest hope and faith I have on anything in this world. I cling on to his warm soft furry body gently and ask him to feel better soon for my sake. I need him. He needs to grow old with us, in this house, amidst lots of love and affection.

John and I have really been like parents the last some weeks. We have been giving him medicines, washing his bottom with saline water, giving him food, changing out water constantly, checking the litter box, and, spending lots and lots of time with him. It has also been a little stressful. Plus, I have school work, tests and the ever present worries. They really never go away.

I try to tell myself “Listen, there will always be something or the other I will be worries about, all the time. So, just relax and calm down.” But it is really not that easy. It is so easy giving advice. We all know how that works.

So, after constant worrying, stressing and going nowhere really, I went to the mall. It is kinda my Sunday ritual.I just need to get away even if I cannot buy anything or much. It does me good.

I stopped by Ulta and Bath and Body works. That’s it. Then came home. Tried studying. But have now given up again and am watching ‘Frasier’. This show is my happy place. My comfortable place. I crawl back to it for cover when I cannot deal with or don’t want to deal with stuff.

Also, I take refuge in cleaning and cooking. I really never saw myself saying this, but I enjoy cooking and might I say, I have become a good cook. I want to bring out my signature style. You know, the way one craves for their mother’s or grandmother’s cooking when one grows up and tries their best to replicate it? Well, I want my food to remind my children of a comfortable time of their past and take refuge in it.

Tonight I am making ‘adraki murgh’( ginger chicken). I think it will be good on this extremely cold day. I bought some naan yesterday and will make some jeera (cumin) rice to go with it too. I am very excited.

I am mighty excited about nursing school too. Really.Cannot.Wait.To.Be.A.Nurse.



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