Here are a few observations I have made about being pregnant in America in these times.
A lot of the things that we have been made to believe that we absolutely ‘need’ as preparation for your baby’s arrival into this world, like, that chic crib, that dresser from Pottery Barn with room on top for a changing pad, a glider where you can sit nursing your baby and rock and swivel with your feet resting on a matching foot-stool , the chevron patterned diaper bag from J Cole because nothing less would do, the newest ‘cloth diaper’ trend, and the freaking sophie the giraffe teething toy that is a ridiculous $24, are somewhat similar to that huge, unreal frosting on Gigi’s cupcakes. It is so, so big and so filled with unnecessary sprinkles, pecans, even an entire candy bar or a strip of bacon that it is simply trying too hard. All I wanted was a simple cupcake. I did not want to grapple with a cupcake for fuck’s sake.
This is how I feel when I do a search on what should I add to a baby registry or what are some must-haves I must have in order for us to have said baby.
How did our parents make it? I am sure I was not changed on a fancy changing table with the supplies at the right distance and right angle, within the exact reach of my mom or dad, I was not fed my nightly feedings on a fancy ass rocker/glider and my mom did not tote around a huge diaper bag PLUS her regular bag that housed the many fancy accessories of the baby-life. And yes, I know things are different now. Those days were a different age and time.
We absolutely do need some of the pricey safe things- a safe car seat, a stroller and a place for a baby to sleep, clothes for him/her, food for him/her and if my breasts cannot do the job then some other form of food, sure !They have some expensive price-points on them too but there really is no way out. Sometimes I think everyone is on it together. The hospital will make sure you cannot leave until you have a car seat installed, the car seat company will not make a car seat less than $150 (the ‘good’ ones atleast, and why would anybody make a ‘bad’ one?), then if you bought a car seat, you must have given some thought to the stroller you purchased because they have to be compatible some way or the other, then here comes the fun part- your extensive research on strollers/car seats. Then you walk unsuspectingly into Bye Bye Baby where an associate quickly snags you, sways you, talks sweet to you congratulating you and telling you how only your baby will be the cutest baby around, so you feel tickled and convinced that she only means good. This person means it when she says she does not receive any commission for gently urging you to consider this brand
. She walks you towards the stroller that is stroller of the year and is priced at $250. But wait, you have to add on a car seat for another $200. Then you also have to add on a base unit for your car, oh and that beautiful and practical cup-holder, that tray, and that speaker which plays soothing nature sounds for your kid while you contemplate life.
Okay, some of these are just my cynical view-points. Not everyone is out there to get ya. But we can all agree that the baby industry is evil and has us eager, vulnerable parents wrapped around its little finger.
That being said, we all want the very best for our babies. So, I will have to end this little observation here while I go eat my frugal dinner and decide between the $300 foam-lined car seat or the $400 one made purely from angel’s tears.